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“Morning. Miss what morning mr calendar. Good morning della. I m hilary mr calendar.
He he calls all the new girls della. It makes him feel like perry mason perry. The greatest lawyer of them all and his loyal secresy zealous street. Loyal and beautiful.
He s living in a time warp well sam just when you thought he ll his clients were done for a witness would leap from the body of the court and start confessing like merit that can t stand it anymore. I did it i put the python in his pajamas. Hillary quite. The wrong idea oh miss flood.
Where s your sense of drama. No. The mysterious case of 40 children boulder s tinley. Know what really went on in that three bedroom semi.
A menage tois that got out of hand a spy ring operating from the garden shed. 87. We re moving into a home you see darla. I just hope you can stand the excitement.
Oh my boyfriend says it takes a lot to get me excited you just keep your eye on that door well the gun runner s bank. Robbers diamond. Smugglers. All screaming for my services oh fighting over last month s homes and gardens yes.
I never thought pina was like that a hotbed dollar. A hotbed as mr. Hinton yes no calendar. You like him.
He thinks he s perry como. What s della. The once a solicitor was entitled to some respect oh when was that mr calendar. I shall be in my inner sanctum.
Oh and one more thing welcome to the firm hilary. What s a month fault. Mr. Canada honest i swear to it wasn t my fault.
What are you doing here she was just lying there or still in that blood seeping out of a white dress and there was this kitchen knife plunge deep into her heart. I swear to mr callender i never touched her my prints are on the knife sure but i couldn t have i just couldn t have oh your exams oh fine that law was a bit of a pig. Though i know it always was well that s where the money is dad there are more important things in the world than making money. Oh i agree those spending.
It counting it admiring it talking to it you get what i mean. That s not what i m studying for i know you want to help everybody well don t the middle classes deserve help all they can get comrade. All they can get by the way. How did she get stabbed well it was my knife.
My prints were all over it well i ve been making kebabs that afternoon. So whoever used it had to know that i ve been chopping meat ahaha. The butcher. The butcher.
Did is yes. We are looking for a homicidal butcher somewhere out. There is a butcher with blood on his hands. You should have been a criminal lawyer.
Dad you know that a lot of my clients reckon. I am. How do you get it i found a legal loophole and crawled through it seriously thinking of letting them join us are you mr. Callender oh miss flood let me storm your barriers and drown in your embrace.
Very poetic. Did you sign that mr. Kalin no how s university. Jamie oh.
I m doing fine with the drugs and orgies miss flood. It s the standard studying i can get yes probably some country or video wants to leave her entire wealth to the jack russell preservation society. Go the loops gone go. And see your sister test your theories out on her.
She s more interested in stretch marks than karl marx anyway. See you later that i i ll make sure he leaves the premises hilary ask. Mrs. Angel to come in earlier please come in i ll go mean how they stealin money just through there.
Mrs. Angel. Yes. Helen oh please take a seat thank you i m sorry about that can i take your coat.
What as a down payment. I ll make jokes when i m nervous. But not very good ones. I wish it wouldn t be nervous hmm.
So do i have never seen this that it s a tub before that is that is it didn t expect that oh that s just me. When i was a young lawyer..
You know get it off it s perry mason. No one under 35 ever does hey this writing on it can have a look. Please cheers alec. Let s crack open a case sometime.
Harry hit. Didn t write that solicitors joke. I hope you don t laugh at us us people like me customers. No clients oh.
Don t worry. Mrs. Angel. The secrets of solicitors offices are sacrosanct like the confessional except it ll cost me more than a few hail marys sorry angel that s a lovely name by the way oh well that s what i ve come to talk to you about your name.
Anyway. You see i m married to mr. Angel yeah. That s the way it normally works except curiously enough in iceland.
The woman hangs on to her maiden name. There it s probably too cold to take it off there s an old song a very old song you wouldn t know it i married an angel did you know that my mum and dad their pillars of the local operatic society. I know more show songs and i know pop songs not very trendy is it oh it is for me that s my spiritual broadway anyway small talk no pajama game sorry small talk it s from the pajama game. Know it of the icing.
Oh. George gershwin. That s right eighteen arms. Oh rogers.
And have no heart rizal fox. Yet divorced me darling now it s not your fault honest shut up and i was doing so quick still you would bury mr. Flemming cryin. All the time no no no no how would you say that here have one of mine.
You probably think i m really pathetic. No no no no when i was a little little boy in glasgow. My grandmother gave me a cowboy outfit huh with all the trimmings you know on a gun. But the very first time i wore it i slipped and fell down the steps of our tenement walk.
And i ripped the outfit and bent the revolver well i set all the steps and i bawled my hand off from a grandmother. She said a little um cowboys don t cry. I said. I m not a bloody cowboy.
Neither the universe is angel so you cry away what did your granny say just don t know it s tears and belted. Me never was one for cursing you re very nice for it solicitor your scottish on you oh you noticed what i mean is what you re doing down. Here. Well.
I have an uncle who is a lawyer down here so i took articles with him i hope you put them back. We seem to be straying. Mrs. Angel yes.
It s a pest divorce isn t it time. I ve done hundreds of them know that how long have you been married to mr. Angel kevin nearly eight years we ve been going out since we were seven he was my first boyfriend. I should hope so i swapped until janus grimwood for my new skipping rope.
Allows that skipping rope. That s not fair. I did love kevin even before i knew what love was such a bearish no you re doing fine this is angel anyway. Mr.
Angel. My childhood sweetheart has been having an affair. How did you find. That oh the usual kept.
Coming home at 2 00 am 3 00 am all hours reeking of guilt. He said. He d been working late i knew suspected otherwise oh he s a milkman do you know who good old johnny s grimwood. Didn t even give me back my skipping rope.
I m sorry are they still learning. See still lovin is milky way with hunter and don t be sorry. It was all going real some cotton anyway we just grew apart. We didn t have any biscuits i found this chocolate cake in the silent oh thank you luria just just leave it here will ya hillary hillary.
I expect miss flood is missing you hillary oh i ll be going then shall i if you need anything else you know where i ll be so they often cry like that miss flat those stains on his carpet are not coffee hilary their mascara. I think it s his eyes. You can t hold anything back from eyes. Like that anyway.
Divorce can be a very emotional business sarah tommy would you file that please bottom drawer. How did you know it was it deforms and read it on their faces criminals look furtive house buyers look worried divorced plants just look. Sad. Thank heavens for people whose names begin with a zit good morning and good morning to you i don t think you ve met.
Mr. Calendars partner. Mr. Henty.
This is hillary delightful did you wanna. Miss his hemp tea have a nice weekend annabelle spent all her time soldiering empty baked bean gins to old air fresheners as a symbol of our polluted society..
I had to make all my own needles. Mr. Hunt is why sculpt what did you eat mr. Henty a lot of baked beans toby of food.
I think it behooves me as the sociable and a simple calendar and henty to escort you to a nearby hostel me for a traditional welcome large oysters. I venture. Oh dear i ve gone and bought me same with you this flood. Believe those weren t true miss platt isn t it what i m here for perhaps if i saved the crusts.
Mrs. Hendrick would weld them all together yourself an arts council grant you never tried oysters oh. Then you shall sometimes i think i owe all my youthful vigor to those plates of oysters. That are regularly set before hos before swine nice place to die.
Oh yes. Indeed meanwhile. I got a rather nasty industrial case at about 12 00. But it shouldn t take too long chappy caught his tie in one of those 24 hour film processing machines have there been any further developments.
No i don t think so well hilary. See you at lunchtime. I ve got a client in pentonville. Appreciate that to hack his way out snow.
Then you were telling me about your marriage. Well. Everyone you were going to get married even at school. I held a mock wedding in the playground kevin made me stuff.
A pillow up my dress. So developed that the real thing. The first years were fine they were fun really then i started seeing that kevin s ideas of what a wife was for were just a bit different from mine. How do you mean well kevin.
Thought women were made about 5 foot. 5. So they just fit neatly into ironing boards. I felt like a washing machine.
I go on for years provided i had a regular servicing so i started rebelling kevin couldn t handle that so he traded me in for last year s model janice grimwood. I suppose what about you mrs. Hansal. What do you do i take it there are no little angels.
No no i teach. Alden hi. I m a pe teacher. For you teacher.
You don t look. Like a sadist. Sorry. Incorporates.
Uh. No huh sorry. They re healthy mind and a healthy body latin adana kebab terra man hollows greek. I m sorry tell me and how do you feel about divorce.
Well i ll miss the double cream on saturdays. Ask so many questions no mrs. Angel not always just as i find you interesting interesting is that what i am. I think you are very interesting eight years of marriage to someone a must have loved once just to end up being told.
I m an interesting case. What is it no i didn t mean i did love him. Mr. Canada.
I m sure you did. Mrs. Angel yeah. Young you re attractive you ll love again.
I know it looks like it. But it s not the end of the world. You know perhaps you could put it down to experience some what some bloody experience can i ask you mr. Callender have you ever had them what would you call it marital difficulties me no.
I said don t tell me about experience. Because you don t really know you may have oh yeah law degrees. But you don t really understand. Mrs.
Ooh. I m sorry i shouldn t have come i m not going to be one of your interesting cases. Mr. Callender to laugh about at the solicitors social.
Well here s one for your top table daddy s room woods having a baby. And it really is gonna look like the milkman. I m glad you ve got a happy marriage. Mr.
Collins oh well done but nothing lasts forever. Except maybe that chocolate cake this is a joke you stink when you get struck off may i have your desk blotter set..
Man. Sprinter is she she s a gymnast us. Oh. My oh no please don t know there.
There are images whizzing around my head. They re looking good out what a 10 15 in the morning is always midnight in here we were getting on so well i liked em isles. I really liked her hey oh. You know what i mean as a person mother plenty more sardines in the soup.
There was a little pocket that hillary is quite the little innocent well let s hope she remains that way doesn t feel the long arm of the law. How did you money work to do. Only. Mrs.
Chip chase you know if it moves suet. She probably wants to give god a writ for not sending as a proper summer. Did you have any more emotional clients you don t want to do it will ask for something in advance go back to your sewer miles yeah. So get that down you five steps you know there are more calories in one of these and then a jam donut yes.
But these are boozy calories. They don t hang about right yuge and um. They whiz about all over the place a little bit here a little bit there so you hardly even notice. Cheered you up loaded in it thanks.
Big sis so what happen this morning. When you come running in the shop. I thought you ve been done for soliciting not been to see one temple still ii deserved it pompous you re not getting cold feet are you i m getting chill blaze divorce itself i know what can t i be like mom and dad we move like this trevor being trevor. Not married reliving.
Single. Nothing. There s been a lot of that lately. But within working nights to me up so early in the shot they start sundy trading.
I may as well join a nunnery. I think i ll come with you what that is hunky p83 ortho h1. What s his name. Rory.
Morgan jones. The tarzana were fitted with he s gorgeous debbie. But it s hardly. The great romance.
How can you love a man whose idea of conversation is this shore up the wall bars todd. One wasn t feeling up to it last night. He asked for a note from my apartment men are so juvenile well calendar. Alec calendars.
Oh that solicitor this morning. Nice was he he was older than dad i suppose that s why he was interesting so smug dubby divorce was something out there people think. But he s got his wife just very much sir same again yeah we re gonna be miserable. I might as well enjoy myself salt vinegar sorry i saw you in reception this morning at the solicitors you were reading a magazine upside down must be these new australian contact lenses so you were there to see mr calendar.
Yeah that s good it did me what was the law being announced more like a painting. So how long have you been an interesting case how about 21 years 21 years. What were you doing handling stolen. Rusks calendars.
My dad oh oh dear. Well that was a bit pathetic. Not telling. Me.
I could have said anything i could have done me for libel. Slander well if you ve screwed it on the door in that loop that d be liable that lunacy. It s the jealous so you re a lawyer. Too are you studying i m doing the licensing laws tonight and then it s thingy calendar.
Do berean calendar is it not if i can help it divorcing bored middle class housewives isn t my idea of a good time right well. It s been nice meeting. You i can see the family resemblance now look. I didn t mean i only ultra precise solicitor.
I told you about debbie will they come in different sizes look back there i m sorry. I i didn t mean you can i sit down. Oh. So you don t mind spending your evening with bored middle class housewives.
No clark. I don t know what to say your mum should sit you both down. And tell you a few home truths. I wish you could probably couldn t get a word in edgeways mum.
Died six years ago not that that s an excuse for what i just said say that again your mum alec handled his wife it was she was ill for a long time anyway god i feel awful you feel awful. Why you didn t do anything that was my herb sir. I don t really feel up to much you stay here. And i ll just get a bit of fresh air well good luck in your room.
I ll see ya she s like one of those plays on bbc2 that start in the middle harry arnett fall into place should i go after her you re talking about the middlesex junior 1000 meter champion. She even runs to the dentist to nt recover soon from those oysters. It s normally got such a resilient stomach oh it when his stomach it was his neck on my first day. Mr.
Callender took me for ploughman s and a sausage still was 23 years ago mine. Even old man thank you hearing you coming back..
There you read hello um. I wonder could i have a quick word. Mr. Callender.
I m afraid he s not in yet and danger isn t it would you care to wait yes okay. Thanks. I can t think what s keeping him. Mrs.
Angel. I hope you haven t had an accident he lives on his own you know yes. I know hilary don t stare. Oh.
You mr. Henty. The warmth of your greeting is like a blast from a heat let miss flood. My neck feels better already good morning hilary main 10t you re seeing your first plan to 10 15.
No correction. My first client will be seeing me at 10 15. I should be seeing the northwest corner of my office ceiling. Mrs.
Angel is here oh well hello answer. Sir i didn t see you there s a damn squash injury. I just can t bear to see a ball going on smashed could you just tell. Mr.
Callender. I came in don t just say i m you know i m sorry. Oh. I do hope you ll be smashing again.
Soon. Cheerio. Ah. So that s mrs.
Angel can i get you a nice cup of coffee. Mr. Henty. Oh you are sweet hilary.
But my mouth isn t quite where it used to be i never thought i d end up a bench solicitor. Mrs. Andrew. Mr.
Callender. I ve just come from please after you i ve just come from your office. My office whatever for well to see you of course to apologize apology if anyone should apologize. It is i mrs.
Angel. I was oddly tactless yesterday. Oh. I don t think you have it i just come from her school.
You weren t there no i wouldn t be it s half turn you came to see me to say. I m sorry oh really there was no need i didn t know about your wife. I mean well why should you i don t burden my clients with my problems. Well.
I think you should i mean i don t mind being burdened burned away you re an unusual young woman. Mrs. Angel not so young young ish when you re my age everyone seems you you re not so old oldish perhaps it will be best. If we go back to the office.
That is if you can bear. Another visit does that mean you ll still divorce. Me this is it the job it would be oh the peer divorce colporteur marry the man today s guys and dolls you re walking too fast for me. No i don t know that one you walk into faster.
Me well you having a wee job with me. Oh. Mrs. Angel.
Just a wee. One is that because you were nervous. Just a little so am. I just a little oh.
There you are mr calendar. So that morning miss flood good morning della good morning. Mr. Collins two coffees please and no kate this way mrs.
Angel. So yeah i m joe jones grimwood. This is a job please i had no idea it gives a whole new meaning to running a practice does ” ..
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